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Gamaliel's Desk
Friday, November 19, 2004
Many outside the Pharisee denomination have the temerity to suggest that because our denominational name has only been in existence for the past few centuries that we are not a biblical denomination. What they fail to understand is that Pharisaism is an essential part of biblical Christianity. One can no more be a Christian without being a Pharisee than one can be a bird and not fly. My critics accuse me of basing this claim on my own personal interpretation of Pharisaism. They say I categorize anything that doesn’t fit with my theology as unscriptural. These miscreants have everything totally backwards, as usual. They make it sound like I elevate my theology above the Bible itself and interpret the Bible through the polarizing lens of my beliefs. What they fail to realize is that all of my beliefs are shaped by the Bible. I believe what I believe because it is in the Bible rather than “seeing” something in the Bible because I hold to a particular belief. What ridiculous nonsense.

Even though I was raised in a Pharisee church by Pharisee parents, graduated from a Pharisee Christian school, went to a Pharisee Bible College and have only attended Pharisee churches all my life, my beliefs are not influenced one bit by my upbringing or culture. They are strictly a product of sound Biblical exegesis and applied study. This is because “no prophecy of the scripture is of any private interpretation” and Pharisee churches take a high view of the Bible. While our beliefs may be unique to the Pharisee church, it is because we are the only ones who rightly divide the Word of Truth. How do I know this to be true? It is because I only study Pharisee theologians and read Pharisee commentators. I wouldn’t waste my time reading drivel from radical false teachers like R. C. Sproul or David Jeremiah. That way I am assured that I will always be correct in my reading of the Word of God.

I am convinced that the Bible demands Pharisaism. There are many denominations today and none of them agree completely with the Pharisee form of Christianity. That is because they do not take the Word of God seriously. I am convinced that any sincere, believing Christian who is not a Pharisee (if such indeed is possible) takes a serious view of the Bible and begins to study it, in time they will see the truth of Pharisaism and will become one of us. So why isn’t everyone a Pharisee? A fine question, to be sure. I am convinced that it is because men love darkness rather than light because their deeds are evil. They would rather hold onto their sins and wickedness than come over to the truth of Pharisaism, er, I mean the Bible.

The Bible demands that we take a narrow view of truth. Too many would have a Bible that is open to interpretation or subject to man’s opinions. These are false prophets who come in as wolves in sheep’s clothing. They want to lead captive silly women laden in sins and tickle the ears of those whose hearts have waxed gross from sin. These are men who will try and teach people that they can read the Bible for themselves and come to conclusions on their own. What they don’t tell the people is that the Bible is a difficult book to read and study on one’s own. It takes years of study and a profession dedication to be able to understand what the Bible says. People should be willing to trust that I am led by the Holy Spirit when I interpret the Bible for them. And I am more than qualified and willing to do the hard work of interpreting the Bible for their ultimate good. This will keep them from having to worry about whether they have interpreted it correctly or not. I will humbly take up this great burden on their behalf.

Not only does the Bible demand that we preach the truth but it also demands that we expose error. It admonishes us to try the spirits and see whether they are of God. Oftentimes a church member will come to me with a tape or book from a heretical preacher like John MacArthur and ask me to explain something that these men have said. I will have to go to great lengths to expose the heresy and error found in these works. They are doubly dangerous because they hide their tiny heretical doctrines in a wash of truth. It takes a truly discerning scholar like me to detect many of these errors and expose them to people. So why do I go to the trouble and difficult work of exposing the errors of others? Because the Bible commands us to earnestly contend for the faith. It is our solemn duty to be contentious and engender strife on behalf of the gospel of Christ.

But not only does the Bible demand that we expose error and preach against it every chance we get, we are also supposed to separate ourselves from those who have error. God would never use anyone who has the least amount of error to accomplish his work. So it behooves us to keep ourselves pure and unspotted from the falsehoods of those who would corrupt the faith like James Dobson and Jerry Falwell, men who are so broadminded and accepting of other persuasions that they could hardly be said to take a stand for Christ at all. These men are proof positive that diligence is required on the part of any who would keep their faith pure. Let me just summarize by saying you don’t have to be a Pharisee to believe the Bible, but if you do believe the Bible, it won’t be long until you become a Pharisee – the Lord’s Only True Church.

"The teachers of the law and the Pharisees sit in Moses' seat. So you must obey them and do everything they tell you. But do not do what they do, for they do not practice what they preach.”
Matthew 23:2-3 (NIV)

Friday, November 12, 2004
Election 2004
Note: A little while ago Dave Blakeslee, founder of www.PoMoXian.com and keeper of the Gamaliel archives at the PoMoXian Yahoo group and inhabitant of a Blue state, suggested that I post Gamaliel’s response to the election, particularly since he lives in a Red state. Due to my travel schedule and other things, I was unable to secure a response from everybody’s favorite Pharisee. Fortunately, my good friend Mike Stidham (known widely online as The Action Sub) was able to procure an e-mail from an acquaintance of Gamaliel, Telemachus J. Dobson. I’m sure you will enjoy his viewpoint on the recent campaign.


Like many of our Pharisee brethren, we rejoice in the election of God's Man of the Hour, George W. Bush. We also exult that the Godless Left Wing Biased Media have correctly noticed that Pharisee Moral Values have been the deciding factor in this election. While prior to the election of the Almighty Ronald Reagan, a graphic of the color red covering the nation was a call to arms against ungodly Communists and their sympathizers in Washington and college campuses throughout our land; Red is now representative of the GOP--GOD'S ONLY PARTY and the lefties are now singing Democrat Blues.

We recognize that it was God's hand at work, delivering us from the demonic hand of that modern-day Ahab, John Kerry. Like many of the evil kings of Judah, he married a foreign woman. In this case, we submit that Teresa Heinz Kerry, that New Age Jezebel, would lead her husband farther away from the standard of right living and by extension, lead God's City on a Hill to rack and ruin.

But let us not rest on our laurels. We must understand that this is not a victory to be savored, but a stay of execution to be used wisely. Our Lord has granted us four more years of prosperity, instead of the Democratic Party taking our Bibles away and forbidding the preaching of the Gospel.

And the possibility of Hillary Clinton in the West Wing? First off, our Word says that a "woman shall not hold any place of authority over a man". If they can't teach Sunday School, they for sure ain't going to run the country!!!! However, it is rumored that sex-crazed degenerate, Bill Clinton, aspires to the presidency of the UN. This, of course, would put him as second banana to #666 himself, at the right hand of the Seat of Satan over the New World Order. (It is regrettable that Our President's father innocently invoked this phrase, thus diluting it of its correct evil connotation.)

We also see this as a deliverance for Iraq. God has delivered the original home of the Garden of Eden (now located three miles north of Tulsa) from the hand of Sodam Insane (sp?). He has now allowed those towel-head heathens one more chance to hear the Gospel before Our President issues the call for Armageddon. It is positively exciting to have a front-row seat as the prophetic writings of LaHaye and Jenkins for this end time are realized!!!!

To sum it up, at the end of the day, I thank God I am not like the liberals who have just recently discovered there is a God and are praying they don't get slaughtered again in ‘08. I have voted according to Pharisee family values since we discovered them in 1980. We have a portrait over the pulpit of Jesus placing his hand on Ronald Reagan's shoulder while George W. Bush holds the coats. We have the ushers tear all non-W04 bumper stickers off cars in our lot. In short, I am thankful that I am not a Democrat, a dog, or Teresa Heinz Kerry.

In closing, God's hand be on you and your tireless call to the nation to observe the Pharisee Family Values that made this land great!!!

Telemachus J. Dobson

A graduate of Pharisee Theological Seminary and All-Night Pancake House, the Rev. Mr. Dobson is married with a young daughter and two cats, all of whom abide in full submission. TJD pastors the Riverbend Pharisee Mission in Southern Illinois.

(NOTE: Rev. Dobson is no relation to that other guy in Colorado. He wishes to make this clear since the psycho-heretic doctor may talk the talk, but since he has allowed his wife to head up the National Day of Prayer Committee instead of doing it himself, it is clear he doesn't walk the walk.)

Jesus said, "My kingdom is not of this world. If it were, my servants would fight to prevent my arrest by the Jews. But now my kingdom is from another place."
John 18:36 (NIV)

Friday, November 05, 2004
Pompous Preachers
Being a Pharisee pastor carries with it great weight and grave responsibility. One of the most important of those responsibilities is to set an example for the next generation of Pharisee preachers to follow in our footsteps. A great deal of what I see in the next generation of Pharisee preachers gives me grave concern. I see the spirit of compromise on every hand, defection from the cherished beliefs of our denomination, a lack of commitment in practicing biblical separation regarding our One True Church (I have even seen Pharisee preachers attend interdenominational conferences and rallies!) and a social activism that threatens to undermine our stand for the Truth. As bad as all of that is, nothing is more disturbing than the arrogance and pomposity of the new generation of Pharisee preachers. I was sharing my heart on this very matter with another Pharisee pastor friend of mine who sent me an e-mail with the following attachment:

In every generation there are those of an officious spirit who aspire to leadership, demanding deference from their fellows. Such men, especially when they are endowed with natural gifts above the average, are the kind who become the founders of new sects and parties, and insist upon unqualified subjection from their followers. Their interpretation of the Scriptures must not be challenged, their dicta are final. They must be owned as rabbis and submitted to as fathers. Everyone must believe precisely what they teach, and order all the details of his life by the rules of conduct which they prescribe, or else be branded as a heretic and denounced as a gratifier of the lusts of the flesh. There have been, and still are, many such self-elevated little popes in Christendom, who deem themselves to be entitled to implicit credence and obedience, whose decisions must be accepted without question. They are nothing but arrogant usurpers, for Christ alone is the Rabbi or Master of Christians; and since all of His disciples be brethren they possess equal rights and privileges.
(Arthur W. Pink, Practical Christianity, p. 178)

This is so descriptive of the next generation of Pharisee pastors that it could have been written yesterday instead of years ago. It is exactly what I see going on in these newer Pharisee churches all across our country. It seems like a week doesn’t go by but some formerly trustworthy Pharisee pastor doesn’t assume the mantle of self-importance and sets himself up as his own sovereign. These men start churches with unconventional names like The River or Fellowship of Faith or some other vague appellation that seeks to conceal their affiliation with the True Pharisee church. As far as I am concerned, if they are too ashamed to call themselves Pharisees, then I am too ashamed to admit them into our fellowship. Nor will I tolerate members who think they can visit such churches, participate with them in their ungodly worship using all manner of musical instruments and soundtracks, clapping and all that nonsense and still be welcomed back into our fellowship contaminated with all these dangerous new ideas and practices. If any of my members try that, they will be immediately dismissed from our church and ostracized. After all, it only takes a little leaven to leaven the whole lump. Do you see how divisive and dangerous this new generation of preachers has become?

These preachers have such a low view of the Word of God that they don’t even use the right version of the Bible. They have abandoned tried and true theological understanding and are embracing all sorts of new beliefs. Instead of coming to us older Pharisee pastors who have been around the block, they turn to modern writers and embrace every sort of heretical idea that comes along. My fellows and I have been interpreting and rightly dividing the word of God longer than most of these young fellows have been alive. And we are absolutely firm, steadfast and unwavering in our beliefs - unlike them who are swayed by every wind of doctrine and the sleight and cunning craftiness of men. I would estimate that I haven’t changed a single one of my beliefs in over forty years of being a Pharisee pastor. They change beliefs nearly as often as they change underwear. And then they have the conceit to say to me that I am rigid and inflexible and intolerant to new ideas as if that is a bad thing. They want to force me into their wishy-washy mode of skepticism and doubt that constantly questions the most fundamental assumptions of our faith. One of the ironic things of this new breed of “Pharisee” pastor is that they believe one and all that no two Pharisee preachers should hold to EXACTLY the same set of beliefs. They are uniform in their call for non-conformity. In fact they are universally suspicious of those of us who all believe the same thing without question or vacillation. Well, I for one will not be dictated to on what I need to believe in order to be spiritual. I believe uniformity is essential to the Christian life. How can two walk together except they be agreed? This militant adherence to individuality is an intolerable compromise with the world, in my opinion, and should not be allowed.

It should be abundantly clear to you by now that these preachers are exactly as Pink described – arrogant usurpers who deny that all of us possess equal rights and privileges. These men clearly do not have the right to judge me as an older and wiser pastor and they should defer to me instead of going about to make decisions on their own. They are like Rehoboam who listened to the council of his peers instead of the older men who were wiser and more experienced. As everyone knows, age has its privilege and these young pastors should recognize that. It is our task as older Pharisee pastors to chart the course of the faith and it is their task to follow along meekly, humbly, gratefully in imitation of Jesus Christ, who learned obedience through the things that he suffered.


Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, “Let me take the speck out of your eye,” when all the time there is a plank in your own eye. You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.
Matthew 7:3-5 (NIV)

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